I don’t normally speak publicly about these kind of sensitive subjects because for one, I don’t know where to begin- my thoughts all over the place; and secondly, it seems like everything that I want to say has already been said. The facts are obvious, and the pain/outrage is real. However, looking around my social media pages, I’m starting to see more people speak out about the racial injustice in the criminal justice system, and if they have the courage to speak out even if they are worried about not sounding so “eloquent,” then there is no excuse for me to remain quiet.
I can’t tell you how many times I have cried myself to sleep thinking about how those I love and care about are not immune to a violent hate crime. They are all one bullshit excuse away from being a victim of brutality and racism. They could very well be the next George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, Trayvon Martin… (would list all the victims, but sadly there were more than 100 in 2015 alone. No doubt MUCH more cases that are not considered to be “high-profile”)
I just hope and pray that this is the final wake-up call that the United States needs to rebuild and create a nation where we can all be proud to stand up for the pledge of allegiance. A nation where there actually is justice for ALL. A nation where I can feel safe to raise my son. But today, I’m being gentle with myself and my emotions. Crying off and on, and allowing myself to feel all the feels as they come. Because although I’m incredibly blessed in my current situation, fear is going to coexist with all the gratitude. And that’s okay. It’s okay to feel gratitude and still experience fear-especially during our world today. 💔✊🏽☮️